Sunday 2 September 2012

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The behavior of a happy couple can be seen in many ways. For example, there are couples that express their emotions by physical contact or messages. In addition, there are some specific cases of happy couples who express their emotions and feelings by fighting with each other. Quarreling is needed for those kinds of happy couple not only to keep their marriage but also to make the latter healthier than before. The quarrels for the couples have resulted in good conclusion. According to the ideas mentioned, at the end of the story, The Lion in Winter, Eleanor and Henry forgave and each other and prepare for another coming positive quarrel. Therefore, Henry and Eleanor are not only a conflict-habituated couple who endure their marriage, but also a happy couple who can enjoy their marriage as well.

Henry and Eleanor couple has shown a process that results in happiness from the quarrel. John F. Cbuer and Peggy B. Harroff call this process “conflict-habituated”. There are five types of marriage that have been defined by John F. Cuber and Peggy B. Harroff. The definition of conflict-happy couple is who have lot of quarrellings instead of having a casual conversation. This is an ordinary example of conflict-habituated couple’s experience.

As I look back at it, I can’t remember specific quarrels.(Cuber,55)




The purpose of quarreling is not to fight, but to understand each other. The quarrels are caused by some kind of feeling of dissatisfaction by one person. Unless one person wants to get something from the other, usually the quarreling is cause by petty things. For the conflict-habituated couple, a quarrel is a way for them to have a conversation. It’s not to make them hate each other, but to know them each other more in detail by knowing everything including small things which are on their mind. Throughout the story, all the facts actually came from the inheritance of the crown. Most of conflicts between Henry and Eleanor are related to their off springs, not actually about their marriage. Without the inheritance, there haven’t been any practical argument between Henry and Eleanor. Therefore, I could say there was a little brawl, but not seriously about their marriage problems. Even the problems were about the public thing such as the province of the Aquitaine, the soldiers and army.

Other kinds of quarrels which are not about public issues were so insignificant and petty.

As it is mentioned, those petty quarrels that Henry and Eleanor have had are the way to understand each other, not t have an actual fight with each other.

It’s hard to know what it is we fight about most of the time.(Cuber,55)

The quote from the ordinary couple experience analyzed by the psychiatrist proves when the conflict-habituated any word, it will be a catalyst of their quarrel, even if the reason why they have fought is petty. Even if Eleanor is the daughter of royal family, and Henry the second is the ruler of England, the fundamental problem for conflict-habituated couple is about the same. This is the way for them to ensure the continuity and happiness of their marriage and relationship.

The behaviors of Henry and Eleanor as a couple can be classified in two ways which are hostile and positive manner to one another.

The new medusa? My good wife?(Goldman,14)

It is the one of examples showing that they’ve tried to defame and blame at each other hostilely. Through the entire story The Lion in Winter, Henry and Eleanor often show their hostility to one another.

Still that? When Rosamund’s been for seven years?(Goldman,17)

By the way, Eleanor and Henry couple also have showed positive manner through the story. As a strong example,

I want to die � I will hold you (Goldman,10)

In this point, I could say those quarrels which were shown do not only mean they hate each other, but also worry and care about each other. The quarrels have resulted in the carefulness about themselves at the epilogue of the story which is showing dependable manner to each spouse.

The other reason why Henry and Eleanor couple’s marriage is quite healthy is that they can overcome the difficulty of arranged marriage. In India, sociologists estimate that ninety-five percent of all marriages are still arranged. Arranged marriage force people to marry with another person who never knew. This is the reason that Indians are not easily satisfied through their marriage. For Henry and Eleanor case, even if they love each other, Henry, the ruler of England, is better to hold the Aquitaine as one of his territories to warn France. No one can say there was no political intervention on Henry and Eleanor’s marriage. But, on the other hand, even though there was the intervention of political purpose, Henry does care about Eleanor and does express the emotion of love. Eleanor and Henry’s arranged marriage is supposed to be unhealthy according to the sociologists’ theory. But the fact that they could overcome the difficulty of arranged marriage proves them as a healthy couple. Throughout the story, Henry and Eleanor do not look like having arranged marriage.



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